Thursday, November 18, 2010

Bittersweet

Today is a little bittersweet for me. Today was my due date for my first pregnancy {you can read more about my miscarriages here}. I can't believe {if things would have gone differently} that Jordan and I would have a one year old baby today. When I think about it, I get this little pain and tightness in my chest. I'm certain it's my heart breaking a little bit more.

Mercy Me "Homesick" 
You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbye
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

4 comments:

:Deliciously Healthy said...

I'm sorry :(

Lindsey said...

You suffered an enormous loss. I'm so sorry, my heart goes out to you and your husband.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry. I just found your blog via a friend (Many Sleepless Nights). I also had two miscarriages...it's so hard. When I read the lyrics to the Mercy Me (I love them) song you posted, it reminded me of a song that is really special to me, from Natalie Grant. It's called Held and it's amazing. I am posting the link to it below. It brought me comfort in some strange way, I suppose. I often think of how we'll rejoice in Heaven when we meet our two precious little ones waiting for us there. Praying for you and Jordan!!

Heather
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iOufqWodFNo

Anonymous said...

Grrr, not sure that link worked. If you just google Held - Natalie Grant it'll come up. Sorry!